With the HRD Ministry of UPA-II on a spree of setting up new IIMs across India,their former coalition partner,RJD chief and ex-CM of Bihar,Laloo Prasad Yadav has announced the setting up of a new IIM in Patna.
Mr.Yadav announced this in a press conference held last evening at his residence."I see Bihar now,and everybody wants to make an honest living;is this the spirit that I wished to inculcate through 10 years of my rule,where is the spirit of Jugaad,of making a quick buck?!!With this intent I propose to set up Institute of Illegalities and Malpractices(IIM),Patna by next year".
Although his detractors suggest that the reason behind this move was Mr.Yadav having too much time at hand after his political career nosedived post Bihar elections,according to sources close to him,he was disillusioned with how often scams were being exposed and corruption was being persecuted."The movement for Lokpal Bill was a wake-up call for him and he decided he had to use his experience and expertise to give an edge over the system to the new generation of corrupt officials".
Sources also suggest that initial talks were to establish the institute in Lucknow,but it was felt that this would provide free publicity to IIM-L,an institute established by the Indian Government.Former CVC Chief PJ Thomas has agreed to take up the role of Dean of the Institute.
Mr.Yadav's PA,Pappu Misra told us exclusively,"Laloo Sir has the perhaps the best credentials for such an enterprise;he's been involved in numerous scams both at State and National level,also he's been taking guest lectures at institutes like IIM-A,so he knows what the competition is like".
A.Raja,Suresh Kalmadi,Lalit Modi and Mayawati have been appointed as a part of the permanent faculty while there are talks with internationally known figures such as golfer Tiger Woods, cricketer Salman Butt and politicians such as former Egypt PM Hosni Mobarak,Pakistan President Asif Zardari amongst others to join as Visiting Faculty.
The selection as of now would be held through CAT(Crime Aptitude Test),however having a criminal record is mandatory for appearing for it.
The institute is also planning to start an Executive Program for politicians,bureaucrats and criminals with more than 50 criminal cases against them.
A number of corporates and government agencies have given an enthusiastic response to this proposal.A senior level bureaucrat in the Central Government had this to say,"This is an incredible step,earlier we had to mentor young entrants,educate them about corrupt practices,had to teach them how to stop listening to their conscience thereby reducing our efficiency;I hope the government makes it mandatory for all applicants for Public Sector jobs!"
ADAG,DB Realty,Maharashtra Government have already confirmed their presence at the Placement Process.Pakistan Government has also shown some interest,which is an incentive for those seeking placements abroad.
Mr.Yadav though has a word of caution,"Corruption is no child's play.There are a lot of risks involved,with this in mind we have designed the curriculum to include a 2-week stint in Tihar Jail as a part of the CSR(Crime's Subsidiary Result) programme".
However,this wasn't morbid enough to deter Illaiya Nunnuswami,24,an IIM-P aspirant from Chennai was happy beyond measure,"This is the best news I have heard in years.All my life I wanted to be a corrupt babu and looked upto people like Mr.Kalmadi,now getting an opportunity to be able to learn from people like him is a boon!!God could not have been kinder!".
Clearly,it's time to dare to think beyond the IIPMs!
